Christmas came. Christmas went. And my momie is now here to stay, well, mb for a few months before she goes Brunei again. i cant label that as 'home' anymore, now that our house was sold, n according to her, the present owner has renovated the whole place. so it'll look rather different when i get to go back next year. sad thing is that i never get to say goodbye to it. mb it's better that way. i can get rather sentimental with places n things at times, n certain times such emotions were unnecessary n not very long-lasting cos i tend to forget them soon. human nature, or perhaps it's jus my nature.

anyway, i was refering to Christmas at the start of this blog. well, my church threw a bash party at Fort Canning on Christmas day, n it was lotsa fun. i enjoyed the company a lot, especially Irene's invited guests. they are really sweet n friendly. i kinda feel sad having to leave early n without much proper goodbyes. but well, i had to rush over to catch the Kung Fu Hustle with my brothers n sis-in-law at 1130pm. oh, that was a hilarious movie, i tell u. i laughed until i cried. Stephen Chow knows how to kick in at the right time with the right blows. he directed n wrote the scripts. this man deserves kudos.. hehe.. okies, mb some ppl dun really appreciate his movies, but i'm all out for the laughs. Meet the Fockers wld b next on my list! n i'd love to watch Phantom of the Opera, but no one to watch with me. mb i will save money n wait for my bro to come out with the DVD version for me to watch. i wun settle for VCD version with bad sound quality.

oh, i forgot to mention the day before Christmas. i spent one whole day at Bugis Junction! amazing, isnt it? i was sposed to meet sister BL there for hairstyling, but she din come till much later. *ahem.. hahaa.. anyway, i din mind as this gave me sufficient time to do my christmas shopping for my family. i bought pressies for my bros n sis-in-law. not cheap stuff as i m working now, n i figure i shd buy them better things, that they can use.

then later tgether with BL, we went to Reds to get our hair styled, n by that, i meant curled. hehee.. it's jus a temp thing, jus to see how we wld look like with curls. well, it was good. i love the curls, so did BL. but it was sad too, cos even before we went home, our hair had straightened considerably. BL's din even seem to hav any more curls at all! thank God we took neoprints when we still had our curls. lovely neoprints they were too. will scan n put them in yahoo photos when i hav time. (which is like many years later.. :P)

we had dinner at this Jap restaurant. the food there is really cheap. i mean, reasonable la, esp when the serving portion is big n filling. one thing i like bout Jap food is the effort they put into food presentation. when something looks good, they usu taste good as well (unless i'm the one who prepares them.. :P). so we enjoyed our meal a lot. i love trying out new places, not to mention Jap food!! me n BL lingered longer in Bugis n finally ended up outside St Andrew's Cathedral to do the countdown, n sang "O come o ye faithful". it was so meaningful then, cos the clock had past 12 n it was christmas day - a day to remember Jesus when He was born in Bethelhem.

then i prepared brunch for my bros n sis-in-law on christmas day too. my 2nd bro bought campagne n yeps, we had a pop-the-campagne session to inaugurate our little home celebration. (remind me to upload pictures when i get them developed!) the log cake tasted really good. it was a simple meal together, but i treasure this kind of occasion a lot. :)

that's christmas for me, and new year is around the corner. here's giving everyone a warm n loving spark to start the year 2005.. *hUGgies* n niTes!!!

ho ho ho.. merry christmas in advance, jus in case i never get to blog again until the great day has gone past... as u can see, my sposedly updates 'later tonite' was, erm, many nights after.. *chuckles.. sorry, maties.. i got busy.. :P

well... yea... Mission Trip brought a different sense of satisfaction. (for those who dun know, i went for a Mission Trip with the main objective of feeding the Orang Asli in the state of Pahang.)i was given a taste of a different lifestyle, n come think of it, i think i have received more from them than they from me. sure, i may have blessed them with food, but they have given me food for thought. n how much would u price such good food? well, besides that, the scenery and air is magnificient up there.. not forgetting the walk. well, the villages are a few clicks from the main road, and it being the rainy season now, well, the tracks are not exactly fit for cars, not even most 4-wheelers. anyway, we had to make some journey on foot, at night some more, n skidded on the path many times.. felt like surfing on the mud at times.. n coupla ppl fell a few times *chuckles.. i almost did, but thank God for supportive frens thru'out the trekking.. ^^

one word to sum it all up: simplicity. this is what i felt. they hav a simple life, simple faith. i guess life is not as complex, or rather need not be thus. life can be, n perhaps actually is, simple. i dare not make the statement that life is simple for fear that there will be third world war in the minds of those who refuse to accept such statement. perhaps, this is true for myself. i always remember this one question i posed to my cell leader. i asked her, "why is life so difficult?" n she said 'why do people make life so difficult?'.. she has a point there. no arguments. yet to actually believe n live that out. well, that would b what i would now term as The Orang Asli Way of Life. *chuckles..

sinkin' my teeth now into the delicious chicken wing rice. o yea.. never mentioned to many ppl before, but the kopitiam in the small sunshine shopping place near my hdb block has very good chicken wing rice! *two thumbs up*.. after the good food in Ipoh, i jus cant imagine myself eating any lesser food here, losing appetite for the common food.. *omigosh.. hahahaa.. :P

yea.. Ipoh was a great place for R&R.. u do nothing there, but eat n rest.. n watch astro.. a laid back life, yeps..well, for first timers like me, i really crave for outdoors, to see what there is in Ipoh.. so when i saw my frens settled n satisfied with watching astro... well, it sorta got onto me for a while.. guess i wasnt that used to the relaxed pace of life there.. after a when i got a hang of it, i was driven back to Spore.. *sobz*... i miss Ipoh......

now to finish my food.. more updates later tonite.. ;)

watched two movie since the last time i blogged. first one being Incredibles. really a 5 out of 5 movie, way out of this world.. hahaha.. i would recommend all my frens to watch, esp with ur family cos i think this is really a good family movie, or with a bunch of frens.. a good laugh out n stress releaser.. hehehe.. for the sake of those who still hvnt watched yet, i shall not say more except this: "Go watch lah!"... *chuckles*

then the other one, jus yest night, was the Thai scary movie Shutter. the blur me din know it was Thai until the story reached the middle end when the main characters went from Bangkok to the small town, then i realised, yea, this is a Thai movie... *piangz... hahahaha.. yea, i was that blur lor.. cos i was expecting to watch a Korean scary movie.. hahaa..

well, it is a totally different genre from the first movie.. stimes i dun know why i still wanna go watch scary movie cos i get scared most of the time when i get out of the cinema. my fren was fine cos she said she forgets n does not take the movie home with her. well, i do. perhaps it is also cos i believed in evil spirits n thus am more afraid of such things... haizz... mus really think twice before i watch another horror show... :(

blotched red nose. i shall b called rudolph the red nose reindeer, or rather sneezy the dwarf. went down with a cold, nothing altogether that serious. yet i went to see doctor for the sake of my fellow labmates, n i din wanna stay sick. working is different from studying in that u need to be healthy, or else suffer for being sick. i cant help but feel guilty if anyone of them get sick in the lab. n oso i dun feel good taking mc...

anywayz, the doc wasnt much help. guess next time i shall not resort to the clinic in NTU. for one, it is very expensive, n i can onli claim $10 under medisave, unlike the 85% that my colleague told me that i can claim from outside government subsidised polyclinics or hospitals. felt like i kena cheated. o well, there is always a first time. never a second time, trust me. n it was jus a cold, surely the doc was overprescribing the medicine. shd hav asked him to cut off the lozenges n cough mixture. perhaps i dun need the antibiotics too since he added it as an afterthought. cut-throat doc! wanna earn my money, that's what... *grr.. hahaa.. sorry, i can b a real miser at times. esp when i feel that i am at the losing end of the bargain.

well, i'm getting well by n by. only my experiments are wrecking me up. stress on the built up. hehh.. who says there is no stress in work? who says that working is better than studying? well... jus two sides of the coins. none the better actualli.. haiz.. this is life.

oyea.. cell group today reminded me to give thanks to God nomatterwhat. well, let's see what can i give thanks to God then... for people in the lab, i guess. in the least i m getting to know them better, getting to talk to them more. (now i minimise my talking due to my sickness... the doc says that it is not infectious.. errr... i dun think i shd risk it...). n oso for a fren who i knew back in NUS n who's working in the lab nextdoor. it's good to hav someone u know ard..

Z-z time.. O God.. i pray for results tmr...

let me see.. where should i pick up from.. been leaving my life behind, way way behind.. well, brief updates then:

22 Oct [Fri]- first day at work. din do much stuff, only managed to settle admin stuff. then had to tell boss that i would not be working on Sat cos i had some pre-appointment. he was generous enough to let me off without questioning me further.

23 Oct [Sat]- a day out at Sentosa. went with the GB girls. it was a rather fun time esp when i joined in their games. it has been a long time since i played team games. n i felt that i had become younger again..

the week from 24 to 31 Oct - frustrating week. not only was i tired from not getting any results, i was down with giving tuition. i almost fell asleep during a session n my lil girl had the nerve to ask me n tell me to go wash my face.. sigh... thank God towards the end of the week, something seemed to be working for my experiments.. i was starting to wonder whether i am cut out for the job or not..

from 1st to 7th Nov - a much more relaxing week. started to fit better in work. oso bcos results are showing tho' can b real elusive n scary at times. thank God for the dinners, ie. cell group gathering at ShuFang's place (it was a looong walk to her house, but the dinner together n chatting with the other girls were worth it).. dinner at the Jap restaurant at Clementi with Fongky n J.. really a cheap place to try out, n the food quality not that bad.. jus dun try the taufu with century egg gravy on top.. some ppl dun like that.. *chuckles*..

oh thank God for my buddy who invited me to go California Fitness with her on 7th Nov (Sunday). i enjoyed it thoroughly, steam-bath being the best!!! hehe... plus a sweet-tooth treat at TCC.. yeps, finally got a chance to go there. tried their oreo cheesecake, but thot it was jus normal. their ice mocha latte too.. but it was very powerful, not immediate tho'. i felt sleepy during the aft, but rather awake at night. hehh.. [hmm.. kinda wasted the morning workout, eh? :P]

more recently, last Wed(10th Nov), had lunch with the Dean of Sch of Biological Sciences n other new staff. imagine, all my years in NUS, i never had such a chance, n now here as a plain staff, i get see the Dean in person. wow.. but it was nothing. jus small talks for the Dean to get to know us. haiz.. not a very digestable lunch, if u ask me.

then that night, had a chalet outing with sister Irene n other sisters. we all stayed up the night to talk, about our salvation, about our current problems with God or with people.. basically a lot of things about ourselves. felt that it was a good bonding time when we became more transparent with one another. we needed a time like this, to build our relationship. then Thurs was a free n easy day with no programmes whatsoever. stimes this is good then one can do what one likes. but at other times, one realli craves for more action, sth like cycling at Pulau Ubin, kayaking to be more adventurous. hehee..

but nah, Thurs found me and buddy in Jean Yip. she did her hair, while i sat ard to read magazines that tell u why ur blackheads don't go away.. why a woman can tahan her husband eventhough he abused n left her, only to come back to her again.. don't get me wrong.. this is not a trashy story cos it exudes a true personality of patient love. she's a Christian n to me, tis is a great testimony of real life. true, granted that she would not b wrong in any case to divorce him, or to ask him to leave the house. yet because her sons asked that they could hav daddy back.. haizz... true life drama...

sth that pastor shared the other day that spoke volumes: a crisis doesn't make u who u are, but it shows u what u are made of.

okies.. then yesterday was Hari Raya. went to a coop fren's house for celebration. it was a nice time meeting up with the coop ppl again. n brother KC found a job!!! *two thumbs up*.. so happy for him. then got to spend some time after the visitation to chat with him. really good to catch up, now that i dun see him so often except during church, n that time is really hard to talk much.. n it's true, what he said, that next time when we meet up, we will be mostly talking about our work.. haiz.. the different phase of life..

went Suntec to meet up with my darling godsis. she's a dear as always. giving me pressies - Hillsongs' latest album!! woooo... i'm so happy cos i was thinking of buying that for myself. hee.. now no need to buy. i finally bought Le Couple. it was on my list for a while now ever since Sin wrote about it on his blog. was still thinking of the other album of Emi Fujita, but i wanna hear more Jap songs. so i went ahead with this album. it was a good buy, soothing to the soul, tho' it is begging to understand more Jap.. aiks.. need to learn Jap.

i borrowed two books from NTU lib on learning Jap so in my free or usu waiting time, i look at the books, but i feel so conscious about reading something else in the lab office, that i dun openly do it. feel guilty, that i shd b reading some journal or sth else. hehh...

ooookies.. i hope this is updates enough for u guys.. heee.. will try to blog more often, jus that when i'm in the office, i dun feel secure oso blogging cos u never know who's reading behind ur back, n if they do nosily check on ur history n see where u've been too.. haiz.. esp when some ppl hav too much time on their hands.. dun get me wrong, i do no such things! hahaha..

had some time after my tuition to go to the library at jurong point. decided that i would wanna pick up some other languages. i tried myanmar, then i tried german. both seem rather hard to really learn. finally decided that japanese is still the best for me.

sister, thank you for reading my blog. yes, this is a special message for u. n if u know what i mean by what i type in the above paragraph, then know also that your child is in safe Hands. :)

watched 2046. what an intense movie! n for the first time, i felt its novelty. perhaps i hav not watched many movies like these kinds before. or is it my first exposure to Tony Leung's love movies? Are all of them as intense, as reflective? *shrug*.. i'm lost on that train 2046, lost in that train of thought... 10 hours, 100 hours, 1000 hours, still lost there...

hehh.. gonna blog a bit now. yesterday i ran 10km!! muahaha.. no, it isnt the sposedly Tuas 2nd link that i ran. they were a lil stern on the BIB number so that onli registered runners cld take part. well, since they hav their reasons being that u actualli ran across the tuas chkpt n such, so i din venture to try my luck running there without a BIB number. dun wanna end up with some complications with immigration that can delay the start of my job further..

anyway, i planned out a cool running route for myself using www.can.com.sg. chk out this website if u wanna find out the dist u walk/jog. it's cool... hahaa.. well, i ran all the way to Jenny's place n discovered a very nice canal where i can jog in future [Buddy!!! WE can jog there next time.. hehehe...].. then down Woodsland Rd, which was quite queit.. u know, the eerie sort of quietness... but i love the railway tracks that passed thru there.. seem to throw me back in time, back into the cowboy olden days.. yee-hahh... *chuckles*

and i ran 10km in 1hour. hehee.. an achievement i m proud of. nyanyaa... but i need a better record to make 21km in 2.5hours. ya, my fren said that i'm a lil crazed in running. but there's all the excitement, the sense of adventure.. the pang of achievement.. a dreamy sighz..

well, for now, to do house chores. mommy coming back tmr.. yeah, it wld b good having her back.. home-cooked dinners.. but now, yea, the chores await me..

phew.. thot i had some pblem with the blogger page. thot that perhaps i hav not come here for so long that they thot me obsolete n deleted me off their user list.. hehh.. that was what happened the last time i tried to come to this post page.. phew, thank God i still can blog... nyanyaa..

this is life. waking up late in the morning. having a lazy n slow bfast.. enjoying the morning rays in the living room. no channelnewsasia to catch cos too late to watch prime time morning, n not gonna heck about the rest of the world. not this morning anyway. wanna jus be on my own. n it feels great. my own space, my own time... it's great taking a break from everything. hehh..

well, i had enough adventure yest. surprisingly my legs are aching today. guess i shdnt hav gone jogging in the morning, knowing what a rush it would be later in the afternoon. hee.. n good thing only Haha went down with me to JB to catch the New Police Story in cantonese.. yesh, i cant let it pass by me without catching it in canto.. in plain yucky subbed mandarin jus wun do.. hahaa.. had to go all the way to pelangi leisure mall too, when the nearest n best place would hav been in city square but they aren't showing it there yet. din wanna wait another week so this is what happens lo.. a small scale adventure.. hehee..

so we found out such a thing as pelangi plaza n pelangi leisure mall are two very different places. n my dear JB batchmate Zhen was correct when she said that tis cinema is very far from the causeway.. hehh.. next thing we found out was that there is such a thing as free shuttle bus in JB! wooo.. jus hav to follow the timing, but guess it was worth the wait.. free wor.. n if u take public bus, u might hav to wait as well.. so what the heck.. nyanyaa..

n the show? two thumbs up from me.. hehh.. i enjoyed myself thru'out. perhaps it was this conscious that kept telling me that i ought to enjoy it after putting in so much effort to catch it. haha... but it was great!.. really.. nicholas tsu was a lil on the sissy side, daniel wu was Haha's fave.. okie.. i guess we din waste our money.. not much of a waste anyway.. jus RM$8!!.. cheaper than watching it on weekdays in Spore.. nyanyaa.. i love spending money in Msia.. :P

as for other highlights from my life: i finished my 21-click in 3 hours 03mins.. a disappointment cos my partner n my time goal was set at 2hrs 30mins but i guess both of us din train hard enough. or, as he put it himself, he needed to start training! akaka... well, there's always the other one at the end of this year.. :) so Sin, i really salute to u, that u can make it under 2hrs.. totally out of this world!..

i did sth so sinful today. not onli did i nap for an hour plus in the noon time, i was also very gullible n vain. see what lack of caffeine can do to one person!

well, i went grocery shopping n decided that i needed to buy toner n moisturiser for my face too. first stop was NTUC, and there a follow-me sales promoter managed to make me buy a day crean plus a renewal gel to remove blackheads (yeps, it's written all over my nose that i hav lotsa blackheads.. ew.. :P).. so there goes $21.. then i still hav my toner to buy. i din wanna buy follow-me toner, so i decided to skip over to Watson.. there, another sales promoter awaits me.. well, there's logic in what she says that if i invest $39 in her toner, it would last for 6mths. my normal toner onli lasts 2mths, so it was ard that cost by the time it comes to 6mths. so haiz... yeps, kena 'bullied' again to buy that toner.. made in israel.. part of the instruction is in hebrew, i guess.. :S

i'm jus so prone.. *wince*

momie went back home today.. flew off in the morning. me n my bro sent her off to senai airport, JB to catch the airasia flight. cheaper for her to come n go back, but more troublesome in going to the airport. then i found out that there is a free shuttle bus from kota raya, JB to the airport.. huhuu.. shall exploit that in future next time.. hehee..

then watched kissing jessica stein to fill up my morning time. it's a les movie, bout how a straight girl becomes a les.. n i finally understand why guys can take it when girls are les.. was talking bout this last night with a guy fren, n he told me that he doesnt mind if his gf is a les... ew.. or rather, it was 'ew' yest.. but now it's 'ooh'.. so that's the reasoning behind it.. the ending is rather open to speculation though.. did jessica return back to a straight life, one which i presume would be quite nice with a mr george meyers?.. hehe.. i know i would if ever such a guy comes along..

read this book titled 'marathon: you can do it!' (probably sponsored by nike to put that in the title.. :P). really a good guide to what u need to do while training for the big run. though i'm doing a 21-click in another 2-3 wks time, this book still comes in quite handy. thanks to the coop delivery man.. hehe.. he's oso running..

so i went for a jog in the afternoon. tried out to put in walk breaks in between my run, but it was a disastrous attempt. cos i think i pushed myself too hard. was sposed to pace myself slower, but cos i got the chance to rest while i walked, i ran faster after that.. got stitch then tummy wasnt feeling right, so i had to stopped after i passed the turning point.. dang.. next time i shall run slower.. still hav to put the walk breaks in practice n see how effective it is..

jus some thots over the weekend:

if u think someone looks down on u,
u're doing more harm by looking down at urself.

i believe in the story of one man,
so i will not debunk others at believing the story of another man.

i got a new handphone!! true to what people tell me: 'if the old one doesnt go, the new one will not come'... well, to the oblivion of some, i lost my hp on tues, left it in the toilet. that was a tormentous day for me, to lose my hp.. n i'm near broke.. so how to buy new hp?!

then how do i get a new hp? hehehe.. actually i still feel strange n uneasy bout this whole thing. nothing wrong with the hp.. i hav already fell in love with it.. it being a motorola, n it being a flip-flop phone which i hav always wanted. well.. sth is definitely wrong with the giver though.. for one, i dun really know this guy; he's a regular customer from the bookshop n i barely knew him lo.. jus talked to him stimes. n he jus gave me the hp like that lehh..!!

well, i did ask him on that day that i lost my hp if he was in the business of buying n selling hps as well.. amazingly he told me that he could get one for me. i told him i wanted a motorola flip flop, but i couldnt pay much. say ard $150-200 onli. then the next day (wednesday) i decided not to buy 2nd hand hp cos i'd rather save money n help my bro buy his hp first then i can use his old one. but then on thursday, that guy jus dumped the hp at me. i was like "..." *speechless*. at first i thot he wanted to sell to me, then i would hav to decline cos i decided not to buy liaoz.. but no, he said give me wor.. all the more i was "..."

then my other part time colleague (the old gentleman) said that this is the benefit of being a girl.. all the more i felt uneasy.. hm.. come to think of it, i hav always been telling ppl that i dun mind having a rich husband.. perhaps i was looking at the wrong age group for that.. should aim for older ppl.. hahaha.. ppl near or in their forties.. :P

p/s: Happy Birthday, Mom.
May u like ur new son-in-law.. akakaa..

finally bought my Reebok running shoes. yesh.. it has to be Reebok. haha.. not that i am such a Reebok girl, not yet but soon to be. well, i hav this $40 voucher from Big Walk to spend n it expires at the end of this month. n golly, this month does fly by fast! so i had to buy my shoes this Sunday, cos i dunno when else i would be going out. anyway, the condition to get the $40 voucher is onli if u spend $100+ on Reebok products in Royal Sporting House, so that explains why Reebok.. but i like Reebok too, so no qualms bout spending almost a $100 on Reebok stuff.. heee.. (yesh, i'm terribly broke now. waiting for my pay day next week from my part time work)

ooh.. something interesting that my fren told me bout new shoes. she's oso a regular marathon runner n she shared how new shoes need to be broken before u can really run in them with ease, esp for marathon when u're gonna be in those shoes for long dist. well, that is sth new for my ears.. "to be broken".. reminded me of how horses need to be broken before they can be ridden by human.. haha.. so that was what i did after i bought my shoes. i went for a run tonite, n gosh, i feel like i can fly in those shoes.. haha.. they're so wild.. perhaps it's the sudden freedom from the shoe box.. haha.. will jog more often now to tame the shoes for the real thing.. which is like a few more weeks from now.. *gulps*

o yea.. got my first sports bra. hahaa.. shdnt b putting this up online, but heck.. it's my first time getting one, so there's a big hu-hah bout it for me.. huhuhu.. then got another Reebok top.. red coloured one.. wuhuhuu.. can wear for church combined service next time cos the youth network is always wearing red n i always fail to find a nice red top.. okie okie, i dun like spending money to buy a red top, esp i know i might not wear it out that often.. but this Reebok top is accounted for in the $40 voucher, n the CCK branch doesnt seem to hav much Reebok stuff, so well.. a red Reebok top it is then.. hehe..

all in all, i hav crossed another item off my shopping list.. ;)

And i got a job!... hehehee... it's like a dream come true, but i knew this dream would not come true if not for God. no kidding... i felt ever so insecure about getting this NTU job after I went for the interview. cos the prof was telling me that he was certain to hire me due to my good academic background. n he hadnt seen my academic transcript then, so it was a testing time when i had to send in my full formal application form to NTU, together with copies of my transcript. every waiting day from then on was a torture.

and something happened on Sunday night. my roomie happily told another of my classmate who was also looking for job about this prof. cos she happened to see my prof's name card on my comp table, and my classmate was online asking her who this prof was that i went for interview, so she told her. at first, i was angry, and felt ever so threatened. n my roomie knew that. she was apologetic, but at that time, saying sorry was jus not what i needed to hear. so i went to the living room to be alone to read the Bible, cos i knew i really need God then. alas, my bro n my mom had to come out, so my last refuge was the toilet!.. haha.. yes, i spend a short while in there to read, to pray.. i was ever so ashamed for my anger, n then for my insecurity. but i really wanted the job. all i can say in my prayers was that 'God, if it's your will to give me that job, then it will be mine', but i prayed hard that i would get a job by this week.

n the reply came only on tuesday night. i gave up checking my email that day n waiting until really late at night before i went online. n viola, an email from my prof. my heart was so feeble, so scared. but phew, i got it!!! hahahaa... so thankful to God. He came true for me, not only this once, but many times before. but it's good to be reminded of His goodness, and yesh, Fongky, good things come to those who wait. ;)

watched Stepford's wives.. n now i'm considering to have my hair cut n build my new image around Nicole Kidman's role... really like her style in that show, esp when she went to the day spa.. i mean, really a wow.. hahaa... to be dressed like a manhattan b*tch. :P

sorry, a little carried away with my language there, but that was what was used in the show. *chuckles* a really good, watchable movie.. had quite a number of laughs over in it too.. sometimes i feel that trailers can be real spoilers, and it's better not to know too much about a movie before watching it. i went along with my frens, simply jus to spend time with them. n it turned out to be a show worthy of my money, every single cent of it. :D

now i'm anxiously waiting for my job application results. three interviews for this week n last week put together, n this is a lot considering the lull period before this!.. so i hav a lot more exposure to interviews now, m better prepared. :)

job job job.. mus get a job soon.. i'm getting sick n tired of part time works. job job job...

heh.. shd be churning out cover letters for my job application.. but the mind does wonder.. n lookie here.. this is where my fingers brought me to.. haha.. anyway, i realise that this is what blogging is to me, an escape from reality.. akakaa...

bottomline for this week: i've gained weight. *shrieks*

well, i wun b so bothered if i din go shopping today for a new pair of jeans. desperately needed one bcos my old one got torn. n no, it wasnt bcos i put on so much weight that it bursted at the seams.. though that happened for my nice black pants this week too.. but well, la la la la... i was talking bout my jeans.. n it was a good worthy 6-year old jeans. bought it in Miri, Sarawak before i came to Spore, so it served its time. g'bye my faithful jeans.. but i guess i shall soon transform it into shorts since it got torn at the knee part.. dun ask how i tore it.. it jus got torn, k..

as for the pants.. well, my jeans was a goner, so i wore my black pants for my bookshop work, n i guess it was too much of a squatting, getting up, stretching here n there.. n it finally bursted.. it was embarrassing, but thank God, in a way, cos it was at the end of the day n Coop was closing.. but i still had cell group that nite.. haiz.. was contemplating not to go, but well, being the good Christian girl that i always am.. *lightning* .. akaka.. anyway, thankfully my long Tshirt could conceal though it was not comfy knowing the idea that ur pants bursted..

sigh.. i din really get much of a dinner tonite too. lost appetite.. haha.. nah, dun worry.. it's not bcos of what happened. it was bcos of what has happened.. try to understand the grammar. LOL..

p/s: Happy Birthday Dad. :)

today, there is going to be a new addition to the Chin family.. no, not another daughter-in-law, n definitely not a son-in-law.. that one is not ready yet.. akaka... well, i'll be having a new roomie.. hehehe... no, i'm not talking about my momie.. *grinz.. me agreed to house my fren for a month's trial n see how she likes it here.. apparently her name has a Chin in it too.. so a rare addition to my family indeed.. well, it's gonna be fun, n she's shifting in today.. hehehe.. this will help her when she starts working this Sunday.. then she doesnt need to travel all the way from JB to Spore to work.. well well well.. this is going to be fun, i guess this is me on a return back to hall life.. hehee.. :D

yesh, i shd b sleeping again at this hour of the night.. but my mind wun give me rest until i say out what is kept bouncing off the neural networks in there.. well, today i had an eye opening time at a Buddhist temple. not my 1st time in a temple as my dad was a Buddhist last time, n i'd been to some before when i was young. but ever since becoming a Christian, i guess i hav not as much stepped into one, jus walked past onli.

well, finally i get to feel what it is like to be on the other side. when i read the book about Buddhism, i could not really understand what it was saying. when my fren told me bout what he believed in, i could not share his belief. then i paused n wondered, is this how it has been like for the people who i hav approached n shared my faith with? were they of the same state as i was today?.. if yes, then finally i can understand why..

but it was a good time spent anyway. strange, n seemingly out of place for me to go there.. but heck, if u know me, i'll do anything not only for the fun of it, but also to satisfy my curiosity. hehh.. i wonder when my curiosity will kill me.. :P

i shd be sleeping, but heck.. mb jus a line or two. it has been another long while since i came here. heck, why does the font looks so nice in the create post page that i am typing now? mb i shall change the font in my blogpage soon, or mb revamp the whole site.. getting too boring with the blue sky, when all u can see day in, night out is the dark grey sky..

well, convo is really done n over with. n this crazy girl went there like 8 times. hehh.. record breaking, eh? well, i took a lot of photos too. when i get the time, i shd upload them n share them here.. hee.. :)

momie is now busy looking for a new house for my brothers to buy n settle in. it would be good then. finally a house to call our own, not that the one i'm staying in is any less, but there would be a different feel to the new house. of course, it would be bigger. big enough to house a doggie for my 2nd brother. dun ask me why he's so enthu bout getting a doggie. i dun mind. haha.. okie, i will own up to it that i'll be so thrilled to hav one in the house. over the weekend of my birthday, there was a shizu doggie that stayed over cos my bro's fren was shifting house. it was the most adorable, almost soft toy-like. i guess it was then that the doggie flame was kindled in my bro's heart. jus hav to learn how to deal with the dung better in the park next time.. hmm.. takes skills n experience, know!

tired. was running jus now. needed to train. jus calculated the other day with fongky, n bro Teoh corrected my estimation of 10k per hour. mus b 10.5km/h, said he. can die.. then we'd b using the half marathon as our training ground.. to be completed in 2.5hours.. *gulp*.. n i jus did a 8*350m in less than 20mins, n the pace was not slow at all.. imagine if i hav to keep up at that for the next 220mins! i can really die... somebody help me.. take me out of this craze...

my poor abandoned blog.. haha.. lemme liven u up with a few headlines that are a-happening in my life right now:

MY CONVO WAS YESTERDAY!

MY MOMIE IS HERE!

haha.. that shd about summarise the hu-hah in my life right now. let's see.. for the smaller details, i went back to sch on Mon, the day before my convo. there was this feeling of emptiness in me, the kind that i always get when i'm about to leave a place, about to move on. well, since i was at OSA to collect my ECA testimonial, i thot, hey, why not a walk up memory lane?

there has been so much construction in that building lately. even the "fish tank" is now more colourful. shall wait until it's near exam time before one can see the fish start swarming in the "tank". hehe.. but the engine bridge was most disappointing. it was still under construction, n i suddenly recalled the picture in the book 'turn left, turn right' where the fountain was under construction. sigh, such similarities felt cos the place held so much meaning to me in my yester-years of studying in NUS, as i think it held for the two characters in the book.

convo day was great! managed to take photo with my lab ppl, even with my prof. hehh.. time to get my thesis binded so that i can give it to my prof tgether with the photos. n it was good to be able to graduate tgether with all my batchmates. we took so many photos tgether on the staircase after the whole ceremony.. the camera was jus flashing n flashing.. n i guess a lot of ppl was wondering when were we ever getting off from that staircase.. hee.. too bad we had to hoard it for a while, well, mb a longer while.. hehh..

then brother Teoh was of much help. (yea, Seanie, mus thank ur brother for being there.. heee..) he being the photographer.. hahh, i think i abuse him that night.. then again, what are frens for.. hehee.. :)

okies, i gotta be off for another of my fren's convo this morning.. chiaoz ppl.. u will be hearing from me again soon..

it has been some time since i last posted a song lyrics here, cos i always find that it takes up a lot of unnecessary space.. haha.. but not for this song. i guess i never knew this song until fongky chose to sing it during our first karaoke session tgther with the Poh Hua ppl.. n the lyrics really jumped out at me, really meaningful.. thanks fongky.. i love this song, n it speaks volumes about our frenship, doesnt it? ;)

Eternity - Robbie Williams

Close your eyes so you don't feel them
They don't need to see you cry
I can't promise I will heal you
But if you want to I will try
To sing this summer serenade
The past is done
We've been betrayed
It's true
Some might say the truth will out
But I believe without a doubt in you

You were there for summer dreaming
And you gave me what I need
And I hope you find your freedom
For eternity
For eternity

Yesterday when we were walking
You talked about your ma and dad
What they did that made you happy
What they did that made you sad
We sat and watched the sun go down
Then picked a star before we lost the moon
Youth is wasted on the young
Before you know it's come
And gone too soon

You were there for summer dreaming
And you gave me what I need
And I hope you find your freedom
For eternity
For eternity
For eternity

To sing this summer serenade
The past is done
We've been betrayed
It's true

Youth is wasted on the young
Before you know it's come
And gone too soon

You were there for summer dreaming
And you are a friend indeed
And I hope you find your freedom
For eternity

You were there for summer dreaming
And you are a friend indeed
And I know you'll find your freedom
Eventually

For eternity
For eternity

first thing as i started my comp today, i knew that i want to blog, i need to blog, blog, BLOGGG!!.. hahaha.. been seriously neglecting this blogpage.. bad owner, bad bad baddd owner.. hahahaa..

well, lemme be the first to blog this down before anyone else did: HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO MYSELF.. hahaha.. i know i'm personally asking for u ppl to drop a line of greeting on this entry.. no, not just asking, i'm demanding for bday well wishes, okie!.. hehehee.. that's jus me, too thick skin for my own good.. :p

had many bday treats this year. and i'm realli thankful, though some may take a pressie to b more meaningful, tt's not for me. i'd rather spend time with ppl. tt's more meaningful to me. ;) lemme say a heartfelt thanks to all ye ppl who hav (or going to) treated me for my bday.. love u all..

finally got to jog today. my 3rd time after i shifted out of pgp. guess it is a lack of nice jogging place, n lack of good company. well, today i went for a jog with dear sister Aeriel (yes, ming n wayz, the same Aeriel that u guys know.. nyanyanyaa..).. n we went along the clementi canal! fongky told me bout it last time n i've been wanting to jog there, n finally did that today. n boy, it was satisfying. the canal is beautiful! albeit a lil scary at night.. but for the mad xiao-onze woman like me, nothing is to be feared, not when i hav a black belt taekwondo partner with me.. hehehe.. aye, it was a good run. we din run all the way, but we walked all the way to the end. there was nothing much there, n i guess the beauty of the canal remains jus as breath-taking as the front bit.

hrm.. me love the canal. makes me think of ol' times. yups. that's the summary of today for u guys. tmr is thursday, dreadful thursday when my lady boss will be ard.. argh... nightmare starts at 9am to 5pm.. how i wish i can escape to my class outing instead, but i took too many off's here n there on either mondays or thursdays n i feel bad to be leaving my comrades behind in the battle by themselves. i need to help them out, be it that i need to take the whole arsenal of assault all by myself.. so be it!.. come ba!! hehehe.. :p

yayy.. finally hav a room of my own at my bro's place. his fren (the other tenant) shifted out last Sun, n i din hav time to clean up or move into the room until today.. Sun was one busy day.. my first Sunday at work in Poh Hua, come think of it. O, there weren't that many customers as i feared n things were handled quite well.. n i'm rather satisfied with myself. hehe.. then there was that one night over at sister irene's place. well, i'm glad i survived that.. though i din do so well at work on Mon.. took half a day off.. then took today off as well..

okies, as i said, i'm sure glad i shifted my stuff into this roomie, even this comp.. n the fan is working jus nicely. need a mattress though.. so for now, i shall still b sleeping outside in the living room.. heee...

well, all this is still rather temporary for now. will have to shift another time for good, perhaps in september... then i can proudly announce really my own room.. hehee.. ;)

i woke up with a start yesterday. really, i screamed when i opened my eyes. i knew i was late, somehow. then i even shocked my bro's fren (the other tenant in the house) cos he took the day off to do work in his new apartment. haha, i guess i never cease to amaze myself, at what i am capable to do. so within 10 to 15 mins i managed to get myself ready for work, even make 2 half boiled eggs for my bro, it being his bday yest. phew.. even managed to get to work not only on time, but much earlier. haha..

then on the bus, i met him!!! i met my fgg!.. hehe.. actually i knew he goes to work taking either the internal shuttle bus C, cos i met him once when i was almost late for my coop work.. but of all the morning to bump into him, it had to be this morning when i was most unprepared, most in a daze.. haiz.. n i din notice him at the right end of the bus when i myself was seated at the left end.. double haiz.. anyway, as i got off the bus, i noticed him.. yayy.. got to talk to him after so long. a lil awkward though.. hahaa.. but it was good... that's what fgg exist for, to make one feel good.. heh heh hehhh.. :p

ooh, lemme tell u bout another guy i hav admiration for. but i wun say he's my fgg. haha.. a girl can onli hav tis many fggs, n this status is not granted to every guy, u know. heee.. i met him accidentally on the bus oso, on my way back from my waitressing work. he's a waiter at my place oso, but for tis few weeks he has been assigned to work at another outlet in Orchard. i admire him for his aptitude in work. he's really sturdy n steady when he's serving ppl. really admirable. though not much of a speaker, he doesn't need to.. i like him this way.. heee.. so meeting him on the bus again was really good.

haiz.. besides being pre-occupied with guys.. well, i'm still waiting for replies from all the job applications.. hope something would come up soon... my mom is starting to get worried.. me, well, i'm getting a lil depressed these days.. that's why need all the guys i can find to make my feel happy.. hahaha.. well, going out today.. no, not with any fgg.. but with my favourite girl, n another mutual fren.. going to watch movie.. but up til now, i can say nothing beats shrek2.. hehehe.. ;)

spent a very lazy Monday at home. was sposed to call n make appointments with companies for this new part time job that i took on. sth like telemarketing, onli that it's on my own time, own target. i get paid $6 for every successful appointments made n if i made more than 8 appts, i get $10 for each, an increase by $4. well, i thot i was smart enough to think of a plan to earn more money out of this part time job as i got a few more of my frens interested to work so that accumulatively we could get more than 8 for a day.

alas, today is day one trial session, n we did miserably. there were onli both of us to start off with, but the list that the company gave me was a repetitive lot. so many of them were jus branch outlets of one main company.. haiz.. me now not sure bout how tis fren of mine feels about continuing doing this kind of job. cos the success rate is very low indeed.. sighh.. i guess i was a lil too optimistic about this job.. dang..

anyway, tmr i start working at coop again.. hehehe.. i know, i know.. i'm jus way too popular with part time jobs.. well, in the meantime while waiting for full time employment ba.. dang, how come no replies so far wan? my resume mus b very lousy.. :(

well, this week has been an exciting one, i guess. met up with my biomed batchmaties on wed for dinner, then thot that i would spend an evening over at orchard either in kino or in borders or in both, given that i would hav much time after the dinner. my frens were sposed to watch van helsing in cineleisure at 720pm, but then their movie time got delayed due to lack of good seats. so well, we had more time to catch up n talk with one another. n for the first time this semester, there were quite a big group gathering. though only 8 ppl, this is already a quarter of the biomed class.. hehe..

then got the excitement of that day. i lost my hp. i realised that onli when i parted with my frens to go n soak myself with some good browsing in the bookshop. man.. i panicked right off. i had no idea where, how, or when i lost it. i called my phone n it rang but no one answered the calls. this could be a good sign that no one had got hold of my phone yet. i guessed it might hav been in marche when my bag dropped to the floor. so i dashed all the way back, hoping all the while to get my phone back. this is not the season for me to be getting a new phone. then back at marche where we sat, i couldnt find it anywhere on the floor. i panicked even more, then i asked the waiter if anyone reported to have found a hp though i knew chances were slim. yeps, no report was made. probably the hp was then safely in someone's pocket. then i was directed to the manager on duty, and he tried to calm me down. hehh.. guess my face showed how terribly worried i was. he tried calling my hp again before getting down my contacts.. and amazingly the person picked up the call!

so that led me to dash all the way to pheonix hotel, where a man named mr lau had my hp with him. the manager din ask what his dresscode was like so i had no idea what this mr lau looked like. so at the hotel lounge i looked around a bit, but no one seemed to be holding my phone, so unabashedly i had to ask the hotel management to lend me their phone. all the while i was fearful that the man might change his mind n keep the phone for himself. so as i called, i looked around to see if anyone was answering the hp in the lounge, but mr lau was actually in the carpark, or so i found out, and that he would drive down to the front of pheonix before leaving the premises. gosh, i was so thankful. so i waited outside, n mr lau could even guessed i was the owner as he beckoned me to move towards his car as it came out from the carpark. guess my face had a big panic look on it.. haha..

phew.. n that was how i got my darling hp back.. so good to hav it back again... safe! but well, i was too tired n sweaty to be able to enjoy kino or borders so after that i went home. haiz.. a wasted trip to orchard, but well.. u dun always get such kind of adventurous experience.. hehe..

watched shrek2 oredi with my bro n his gf, it being her bday today.. hehe.. sometimes it's really great watching with my bro cos he's the one paying.. n shrek2 is really funny!!! definitely better than shrek1. i love it, i love it, i love it.. hehehe.. cant wait for my 2nd bro's vcd then i can watch it again n again... hehehe.. shant spoil it for all of u, so u guys better go n watch it.. :)

darn those kids. i know, i usu dun get angry at kids cos they're so angelical n like cutie pies to me.. but today.. man, they spoilt my show.. the one with my fave actor in it.. kept talking at the back.. man.. for once, the seats far away from the screen is not worth its money.. dang those kids.. now i guess i know how mr J felt in his entry last time bout noisy audience. sighz!.. but brad pitt is so gorgeous. haiz.. too bad he has to die.. now me itching to know bout the history.. i've always been fascinated about ancient mythology n legends n stuff like that.. well, i shd jus go n read bout it.. a day in borders or kinokuniya sounds welcoming.. hehehee..

hmmm.. i've been working part time for five days now. and all i can conclude is that i'm quite gullible, n i'm easily flattered.. hahaa.. first one was for being tricked ever so often, either by my boss, or by the other people there.. even got fooled by the myanmar guy who told me he's from johore.. haiz.. so now, mus double chk.. hehe.. then also, when the guys there say things like i look young... wait, or rather that one guy say that i'm young in my character.. haha.. nothing to do with looks.. well, i was also flattered then.. hehh.. well, he's making me feel too good about myself.. sighz.. it's so easy to flatter me.. i shd put on my guard though i dun think they are serious bout anything.. hehehe.. but they're nice ppl to know still.. :)

conclusion: i'm still learning much from life about myself, and about other things. life still holds so much more things yet unknown, yet to be discovered... hmm...

i guess i aint that good at waitressing no more.. cant rmbr myself trembling so much when serving ppl, esp when re-filling their cold drinks. i had to tell myself to steady my hands, dun shake, dun b afraid. haiz.. but it's still a thrill though. it might get routine, but the customers always change so u meet different ppl all the time. some are nice, talkative, smiley.. while most jus want to be left alone with the other person (usu my guess is someone special to them.. hehe..). what makes my day at that place immensely would b the company i work with. guess this is very much the same in the lab. yea, a conducive working environment is impt to me. i like the ppl there.. heck, even my eccentric boss who sings like he's in a karaoke bar when no one is in the shop, n who also likes to call me 'brother'.. n i jus found out today, he does that to other girls as well.. phew.. :P

oh well.. mus really start thinking bout my full time job soon.. hehe.. havnt sent out any applications yet.. heck, even my resume is not done yet.. hehe.. will get that done tonite.. many lsm students n even my batchmates hav started applying liaoz... hmm... :S

i prefer this world to be simpler. boy likes girl. girl likes boy. and they live happily ever after. that will be good n simple. but in this world, that doesnt happen often enough. well, u get a mixture of boy likes girl, and girl likes boy, but they dun end up tgether, or mb they like a different person. that's sad. sigh, been having too much movies lately on the vcd.. planning to catch up with them all before i really start working. but i dun quite like my stale life now, in between post-uni and pre-work, it's like being held up in limbo (reminds me of rasputin in that dreadful place in anastasia).

o well, there's a part time job to look forward to later today. hope that will spice things up. anyway, a lot of nitty stuff to settle ard here, jus lazy to get down to it. sigh indeed!

decided to walk back in the rain from Steffy's place. spent the nite there cos i felt that PGP was too empty, too quiet for my liking, plus my room was in a deranged mess. well, i'm shifting out today, so that's that. the end of my school life. the end of my campus life. i'm going to stay out, move on about in life. wonder about life mysteries. yea, i'm feeling lost too. need to find a bearing in my life again. gosh, i hate changes. i hate it when i get all so comfy in my environment, things hav to change, people hav to change.. things mus go on, ppl mus go on.. this is life ba, i guess.

haiz.. okie, lemme get on with mission impossible 0147: shifting out. haha.. i wonder why i put myself thru all this torture. my innate stubborn stuck up self ba. hehe.. well, u know what they say, something jus never change *winks*

have i told you all what a good brother i have?

hee.. now i dun hav to feel so guilty blogging this down, cos this entry shall b dedicated to my dear brother, Alex!! he has in a tactful way allow me to use his laptop overnight, without me feeling so guilty bout it.. hehe.. now i can watch AMi on his comp without going to TV room.. yayyy... :D

if he had been a girl, i'll give my usual *muaks*.. but cos guy ma, so erm.. shall refrain from that.. haha.. but i'm really grateful!! yea yea yea.. shd show my gratefulness by working hard at my thesis yups.. hehe.. okies, that's jus what i'm gonna do!.. but 1st, a picture of this handsome brother of mine.. hehe.. introducing mr Alex -->

[action taken: picture removed.]
(okie, ppl complain that they cant see the pic. well, jus too bad then.. hehehhh.. :P)

heh hehh.. n u thot u'd b able to see his face right? of cos i wun show his face laa... copyrighted ma.. hehehe.. like some chow yun fatt picture hor.. can see back (or head in this case), but cannot see face.. hehehe.. me need to ask permission before putting his picture here ma.. so for now, this shall suffice.. yes, this is the person i'm really grateful to now.. hehe.. not jus once, but he lent me his laptop twice liaoz!! :D thankee yee, brethren!

i promise myself this will b a short one.. feeling guilty using Lex2's laptop to come here n blog.. but currently my brain juice is so dry, sien of doing my thesis, no motivation there.. n studying.. well, i keep thinking of my thesis.. haiz.. this is a vicious cycle.. :(

anyway, jus to announce to u guys that i'm still alive, though living with a dead comp.. hope its ressurection day will come tis Fri when Dr Yi Ko comes n help me see what he can still make out of it. and i bought myself a small notebook over the weekend, all too timely too. that shall b my temporary blog arena.. hehehe.. ;)

independence day 28th April 2004, 12 noon.. mus keep that in mind n already activities are piling up... hehee.. shall b happily busy after that.. :D

yesh.. i shall boast of another night conquered.. hehehe.. well, it's good here, at my bro's place. usu i come here jus to relax. i guess it's this relaxed atmosphere that i need. now armed with my eld bro's laptop for the nite, n my 2nd bro's entire beachboys songs on the cd which he burnt esp for me!! (currently i'm jus crazy bout the beachboys. hahaha..).. *muaks* thanks brothers!! hehehe.. yeps.. this is the way i think i can piece my thesis together. hmm.. i like it here. hopefully i can bring bits of this atmosphere back to my roomie for next week. ;)

jus had frozen papaya with chocolate syrup.. not jus any syrup, but hersley's choc syrup!! yumz.. hehe.. i know, i know, what they (yes, the mysterious 'they') say bout not trying out weird food combi jus before ur exam. but well, i bought the papaya some time ago, had it cut on Tues, or was it Mon? anyway, the point is that it had been in the freezer for a while, n i hate to waste food or allow it to spoil.. yea, i'd rather spoil my stomach.. hehh.. anyway, still feeling fine now.. hehe.. :p

well, a few more hours to my first exam paper for this sem. actualli not my 1st paper cos during the sem i did take one paper liaoz. hehh.. last nite i was feeling like not sleeping but i know what effect that will hav on me, so i forced myself to sleep at least 6 hours.. got up energized n managed to look at my lecture notes without freaking out (eeks, why so many foreign points wan?!!! nvm nvm.. calm down, it's open book, it's open book.. and u hav 2 hours to do 2 qstns.. no way u can flop, right?... right?!!... yes, right... hehh...)..

okies.. short break over.. back to cosolidating those ..eeks.. foreign points.. :S

oh, let me cry.. let me jus die ba.. no AMi for me tonite.. my new temp harddisk doesnt hav any driver for my sound card so it's really a torture not having any sound n jus seeing the ppl singing on ch5... *wail*... tmr got exam paper some more.. how to study with all this frustration in life?!!!... grrr...

o well.. my fren commented yest that all these are actually luxuries in life that we enjoy, that we dun need. luxuries that hav been made into needs. haiz. come think of it, her saying has some weight. many years ago cars or any form of transport was not seen as a need, but today, u jus cant go anywhere without the transport system. well, of cos u can.. then again, who would?... haiz...

wait, i'm not thru' whining bout my missed AMi... WHINE!!!... :(

and yea.. it's really hot these days.. sweltering hot. went hiding in medic lib today. some cool comfort. even the temp in there are not as freezing cold as last time.. brr.. what's happening to the world these days? a rise in the temp is bad for coral reef. can cause bleaching, n if prolonged, it can kill the corals.. bad, bad, baddd.. haha.. yea.. preparing for tmr's open book exam. jus thank God that it's an open book exam. i dun understand why lately, this sem esp, i'm getting all the panic attacks. my last sem, last series of exam papers to take.. n then all the insecurity that i feel.. sigh.. getting a little unnerved now... okie, time for my shower, some cooling comfort i hope... no AMi... *cry*

dang.. comp realli crashed last nite. the trojan or wadever wormie was jus too powderful.. dang the wormies! they want war? fine, war it is then.. onli that i hav oredi lost the battle.. haha.. now using my dear brother Alex's laptop.. hehe.. while he's away for his morning exam paper, here i am blogging.. okie okie.. shall not blog too much.. need to get down to serious work today. gonna study for my open book exam tis Friday.. but open book ma, so seemingly not so threatening.. well, that is cos i havnt realli looked at the past yr exam papers yet.. jus looked at the onli one that i managed to print out last nite.. seems quite tough.. *gulp*.. o well.. anyhow oso hav to sit for it wan ma.. :p

hmm.. will b getting a foreign harddisk from my bro tis evening.. ew.. foreign, alien.. o well.. need to get used to it.. mb i can store more trash.. hehe.. btw, warning to those with poor anti-virus software.. stay away from xanga website (hee, no offense lil brother).. cos me seems to b getting all the virus from there, or i can confirm thus far that i get funny pop-ups n home page settings installed into my internet explorer. n trust me, i surf no porn websites, k! God forbids! well, i guess my compie realli has a very low immune system, that's why more prone to all these viral attacks ba.. sighz.. get well soon, my poor lil compie.. i miss u lots!.. :S

*ahhhh*.. cant take it no more... :S

but i guess in times like these, God always blesses me with little happenings in my life. hm, like a short chat with a good chum in the morn n an sms from her subsequently.. that's gotta make my morning bright n cheery.. then followed by a looong chat with a fren over icq.. i think he's sian bout studying oso.. well, he'll be having all his papers in one go, from thurs til sat.. at least then he'll hav his celebration by the end of tis week! but for me, it wld b the mere beginning!.. *dread*.. then me got a study date with a fren for my open book exam.. that has got to help get me studying rather than bumming ard trying to get my thesis done (which currently is still at a very shabby n pathetic state).. n my darling godsis called too.. yayy.. all the little angels that God sends to me..

oh oh.. it's brother Seanie's bday today too.. happy birthday lil brother!!! :D
hehe.. i bold it up so that everyone will take note.. ;)

then there's family. my sis sms-ed me. yea.. good to hear from her. then my 2nd bro jus told me that my mom's registered letter has finally arrived.. phew.. thot it was lost in the mail or sth.. hee.. the letter carries a precious cargo.. hehh.. shant tell u all.. :p

o well.. God has His ways of controlling me too.. think i watched too much naruto liaoz.. my window media player is not working.. my comp got infected with many wormies.. mostly trojans.. sigh.. sick comp, sick owner.. Lol.. so slow now.. n poor comp, needs to see the doctor ever so often.. but more or less on the recovery stage.. :)

okie, i guess i really need to count my blessings.. now i feel better oredi.. hee.. God bless each n every one of u for ur exams tis week.. :)

i die die mus oso blog tonite.. hahaha.. fingers itching to blog.. brain bursting with activities.. even though i told myself that i need to restore my usual sleeping hours, cant afford to be a nite person no more.. not much of one anyway, considering that i dose off or KO very often if i force myself to stay up late.. n tis morn, i was bed-ridden. was jus so tired to get out of bed. yeps, losing that steam to go on.. but go on i mus.. n yeaa... today i really concluded my labwork. once n for all, i washed my hands off my stuff. hehh.. transferred my cells under the care of the master student, cleared my reagents... gone, gone, gone, all gone.. nyenyenyehh..

well, i manage to catch the Passion for the second time, with my bro n his gf. shall blog about it in my other blog (chk it out under my fave link 'a part of my world'). going out was good. yea, i do believe that we humans need to go out once in a while.. hehehhh.. i'd really love an Iora's striped blouse.. it looks really nice, n i tried on their skirts before. looks good too.. hee.. n ooh, saw that this high tea item at crepes n cream going for $5.50 with cake n coffee.. what a good deal!.. sigh, the not-so-good-side bout window shopping is that u see what u want, but u jus cant buy or get. no money no talk. :p

and these days, i've been contemplating bout getting a bf. hahaha.. *blush*.. yeaa.. what's wrong with that? ur reply might b: 'well, nothing wrong at all, jus that do u hav to say it out loud in ur blog? who are u trying to tell?!!'... erm.. hehe.. i'm trying to tell ALL of u... hahaa.. attention to all ye available bachelors.. ahem.. okies, enough of that.. what i mean to tell u guys n gals is that i've been quite in the pits lately. who wldnt be? exams being ard the corner.. okies, those ppl with onli one paper to take, u guys are not allowed to say anything bout tis.. :P bleh.. back to what i was saying, so, it got me thinking that having a bf might not b that bad after all. i'll hav someone i can whine to.. haha.. oh, i know i always have Someone to whine to, but it's jus not the same.. i guess He knew, n that was why He created Eve for Adam.. hehee..

anyway, i was jus thinking. no harm done in thinking onli, right?.. but i guess i still prefer the kind of freedom i hav now. kinda enjoy it. the freedom to hang out with lots of frens.. to spend time getting to know people.. it's really interesting too.. well, i guess i still cant get myself down to committing myself to one person as yet. nops.. that din happen to my 1st relationship, n that was partly why it flopped. so i guess i wun be ready for another relationship as yet. :)

yesh.. conquered another night at my lab. hehh.. actualli it wasnt necessary to stay back, but i wanted to get my work done asap. n oso if i ever get back into my room, i'd jus sleep n sleep.. or b in the sleepy non-working mode.. so needed me lab to do my data stuff too.. heee...

now waiting for my MacD's bfast with sister Jenny. hee.. it's her bday today.. hehehe.. n i'm making the most out of it by having macD's bfast with her. i hope they still serve that new bfast bagel item... hmm... yea.. with lil piggie, it's all about food.. *chuckles*..

ooo.. i went out with my fren from Brunei yest.. yeps, another day out for me.. nyanyanya.. i gotta hav it lar.. i think i will die if i jus continue on working straight non-stop.. gimme a break.. i need to have life, n have it to the full!... hehehe.. anyway, my fren bought this Sun Yanzi The Moment CD for onli $9 n i swear it almost near original.. it might jus as well b original.. but going for $9.. wow... and i fell in love with this other song of hers called 'tian hei hei'.. hmm... dreamy.. i want the CD!!! hehee.. shall get it when i get my first pay.. hahaa...

finally got to watch passion yest.. sizzling hot-news item passion.. yea, that show about Jesus Christ, the show that everyone has been talking about, it being the controversial movie of the year, perhaps of the decade, or century even.. so hyped up... but when i went to see the show.. o well... someone said i shd bring tissue paper.. well, i did tear a bit in the show, but i wun say i cried buckets.

i was more intrigued by the language. n a few scenes that i couldnt recall reading from the Bible. yar.. perhaps i was comparing most of the time, trying to make heads n tails of what they were doing. i do like the flashbacks though. the time when Jesus was with His momie, that was like seeing Jesus as human, as u and me, as someone else's son. Jesus has all the while been God's Son to me, God in nature, Jesus = God. this show makes me see Jesus in the flesh, how He is just like u and me..

n the way they tortured him.. well, that was jus plain gross. sadists! absolute mean n lowly people. how could they even hav it in their hearts to do such mean things to another fellow human? no matter how much a person has inflicted hurt on another, he doesnt deserve to be punished or tortured to that degree. my fists jus clenched at every single blow. the nails that went into the hands.. feet was worse.. i could feel the bones breaking at every single blow... O God... why? why were those people so mean??

okies, shall not say more about the show. go watch it for urself. i sure dun regret watching it, esp not when i watched it with a coupla good frens. though i cant agree more with vvayz that this show could be better watched alone. mb then i wun b so conscious.. mb then i would indeed hav wailed n cried buckets.. but i guess, if that was the case, yea, i would rather watch with frens. let me do the crying when i'm alone with Him, not in some cinema with many unknown faces, no.. this is not a show staged for others to see, but one between me n Him..

as an ending note about the show. i really thank God for Mel Gibson for making this show, n putting in as much Bible perspective as possible. Now, millions in the world would have seen Jesus, and carry with them back a mental picture of what He has done on the cross.. all His suffering.. yea, can we ever outbeat Him in all that He has suffered willingly for us?..

yest was a good day. :D

morning was rather crappy. expt flopped big time. wasted my effort in going so early to prepare. felt ever so wasted, n hated what i'm doing in my lab ever so much. hate the term known as 'optimisation'... hate it, hate it, loathe it.. haha.. actually now, i think i lost the effect of capitalising the phrase 'loathe it'. i had in mind to really put it in caps to accentuate the extent of my frustration that morn.. but....

thank God for the special kind of ship that He has given me. yeps, thank God for friendship. spent the rest of that day with friends.. am thankful for their presence in my life. hehh.. n i really need everyone of u. *MUAKS*

met up with an old brunei fren in the evening. went to this nice vegetarian restaurant with her in bugis. her treat!! *face brightened up* cos she's working ma, so can treat me lor.. Lol.. but then me treated her to a movie. wanted to watch the passion of Christ but ended up watching twisted cos we din know that the passion would b screened in hebrew. i mean, it would b cool to actually b able to hear hebrew being spoken out.. but my fren wasnt too keen on it, esp not in reading english subtitle throughout the show. hopefully they hav an english version one being screen somewhere, so that we still could go n catch it some other day (before friday.. eeks, cant believe she's flying back home so soon!!)..

well, a day which started out bad in the lab, ended up blessed in the lab.. hehehe.. me took 198 back from holland v after sending my fren home, n guess where the nearest spot the bus can dropped me... yups, at the bus stop next to the SRC track. so sigh, since so near to science, then i popped by my lab to do some expt that i was sposed to do tis morn so i dun hav to go lab so early in the morn. hehehe.. called up another fren then she came by my lab so that i could help her out with her dilution calculations.. went @_@.. thank God that my maths can still b used. Lol.. had a very early bfast (my fave durian mt fuji!!) at NUH... sigh.. KO like a log at 430am..

yea... yest was a good day. had the most fun so far in the past few weeks! :D

yesterday, i was eating for eating's sake...
today i was eating for hunger's sake...
i think i reached a satiety state...
that i jus dun feel like bingeing anymore...

oh, today was half a bowl too much of tau suan... craving for all sweet stuff is gone liaoz.. feel like puking even when my RA (Tini is back!!!) offered me a pinch of her kitkat... :S

finally get to hav my tau suan today!!! hehehe... been craving for that for some time now, but every time i went to buy, the auntie would tell me sold out liaoz. haiz, that was like so sadz.. hehe.. but today very that happie!! get to eat my tau suan!!! hahahaa... yar, i can b that crazy about food.. hehee...

my mind was restless, my body crying... and my feet, well, they went running.. Lol... :p

>>>The Security Guard

As I was walking back after my Monday jog, I chanced upon meeting him walking down the slope in the opposite direction. It was him, I couldn't be mistaken as I could remember him the first time I saw him. But does he remember me? He must have seen so many faces that the next one he sees would just register familarity and not a hint of identity. Yet how could I not remember him?

It happened that very first night I spent at PGP. I came back very late, it may well be the first time I travelled along that route so familar to my night vision now. Imagine, my very first night, and I came back ever so late. Then I realised that my card was spoilt and the lift wouldn't grant me access to my floor. As if that whole day wasn't bad enough, and it was my first day at PGP. It took me a round-trip back to the foyer where I spotted a lady guard to see what she could do for me. Then, the Fire Command Centre sounded so foreign to me, and I had to ask for direction. Tears would have pinched my eyeballs if they hadn't been drained out earlier with the soap opera in my lab. Then, came the security guard to the rescue. I was ever so grateful to get immediate action from the security post at the basement. I guess they could distinguish a newcomer and give more courtesy, or were the puffy eyes showing from below the shadows of my forehead? That was how I got to know the security guard.

Where is my security guard now? He doesn't know me anymore.

we are all beggars of love and sympathy.

another week has ended. another week is yet about to start.

practically ran down the green staircase this morn, thinking that something was following me from behind. hehh, actually this was aggravated by seeing a man in black (totally black!) walking up the road towards KE7 as i was crossing the road to the green staircase.. heart thumping, adrenaline pumping.. i walked faster so that the guy wun see me, then while there was still light at the staircase, i tumbled down the steps. hehh.. *spooky* i really shd considering taking the long route next time. i hate being so routine, just to play safe, so i shd switch between the routes so that anyone who wanna set a trap might jus b waiting for nothing.. Lol... [me jus thinking of the extreme cases here, watched too many homicides on TV].. :p

and there is light! hee.. after two nights without light in the kitchen, it's almost unbearable, esp when i come back quite late n i wanna cook sth. haiz.. hehh.. :p

oh, today was lotsa fun. actualli these few days in my lab, all the ppl there (me inclusive) jus went bonkers. Lol. we're jus mad lar. too stressed? hmm, mb. anyway, tmr is my boss' bday so we had a potluck session today. it was lotsa fun. me, n two other labbie frens prepared apple pie (hee, my specialty so far, i think..) n brownie.. yea.. the brownies.. sigh.. after the bad experience at west spring sec sch (the sch i'm doing my mentoring), i realli thot it was the brand of the brownie.. but today i made the discovery that the brownie needs to be COOLED so that it will harden. Lol. i can still recall kelvin saying that it tasted like 'nien kow' - the cake u eat fried during chinese new year. hahaa..

well, seem like this week i'm plagued with cooking sessions.. haha.. tmr's my other fren's bday too. so me shall attempt to bake her a cake. ahem... hee.. another fren making lasagnia.. yumz.. now i can learn sth then mb try out on my guinea pigs.. :p then Sun, another fren who's dying to eat pancake shall come over n make pancake.. hehehe.. yea, realli a cooking week, this week shall b.. n me, i'll b so well fed, feeling fat (it rhymes, it rhymes! :p)...

now, to digest the food for the brain... data n more data... *bonkers*

*hm*.. decided not to sleep. jus 3 more hours before i have to get up to do my usual morning chores of brushing my teeth, washing my face, n having my breakfast anyway. might as well, go and analyze data. spent the past few hours tidying up the ppt slides oredi. now i felt better that i hav contributed to the group by editing the slides. hehh..

i ate too much today too. think the food is helping me to stay awake now. for all u pizza lovers out there, the chicken floss pizza at pizza hut is realli good.. reminds me of breadtalk's floss bun.. yumz..

i wrote this down on the bus back to pgp. din bring any good book to read for the journey home, so might as well write sth. hee..

the world is still the same as i read about it in the news - terrorism on the rise, muslim extremists being blamed, floods, elections, features on advances in science n tech (did i mention that my prof got the limelight in two recent articles on cancer?) *yawn* doesnt the world ever change, for the better? it was a lot more enlightening when i picked up an 8days magazine. i guess entertainment portrays an ideal world that we long to be in, untaunted by the many mishappenings. for sure, many shows are beginning to be more realistic these days, but even in that there is this sense of idealism. Sigh, i dun know whether u can follow my flow of blabber..

oh, and this special feature of 8 days' in Adelaide was a real boost, too. i guess the reason why i din take much interest in browsing thru travel books was that these places would just remain in the pictures to me. all that has changed now. new possibilities are opening up n i'm seeing myself on the move - travelling! this mus surely be the fruit of a good job that pays well enough for me to go out of this tiny island. yesh.. i'm very much looking forward to that!

sigh, was jus thinking how good it was that my lab fren shall be off to US for this summer camp. it's really a marvellous deal, n i guess some of u ppl might know bout it. for the benefit of those who dun, well, u go for a summer camp to help facilitate n look after the kids there for about 3mths. think about it - 3mths in US! what an experience! though i'm not that keen on US, still it's really a 'wow' (sorry, ran low on vocab to describe this feeling of awe). in return, u get a free ticket (i think), accommodation n food provided for. plus, u get to meet a lot of people from around the world! really splendid! my fren went for it before last year n i din hear a word of complain from her bout it! ;D

well, i guess this whole future of going around the world is now quite feasible. onli that it cant happen right after i graduate, which is sad really. i was looking forward to the trip to Perth at least, from my uncle's sponsorship but since the anticipated arrival of their first grandchild in May, he has not said anything about that again. i wun wanna pester him over such matter either, dun wanna b a financial burden to him. shall look for my own keep, then go out to the world to have a peek. even going home after exams seem bleak now.. o well, onto writing n sending out my resumes by tis week..!

backpacking!

that's the magical word for today. heh.. something that can motivate me on in whatever i'm doing now. Lol. was talking to my post-doc staff in my lab, n he was sharing with me his experiences in travelling. man, that guy is so cool! he has been staying at so many places he can even boasts about the different PRs he has collected! darn, that's sth that i'll love to do, too. n i onli hav my brunei PR now.. haiz, well, it's a start anyway.. :p

and yea, he told me bout his backpacking experiences. he spent 6mths backpacking in Aussie.. waa... cool!! then he mentioned that there are organisations for backpackers, then u can go on group backpacking so u wun backpack alone. yea, that'll b cool!.. n when u run out of cash, well, the backpacker bulletin board has a list of jobs u can take up.. yesh!! this is really cool.. hahaha.. sorry, i havnt got over the excitement of the day over this bit of meaty news..

hah, n i got my room re-organized after i got back from church too. yea... now, it's no longer the comp by the bedside, but it's back on the table so i can start doing some serious work. yeps.. got lotsa data to analyze, n my labmate cant believe that i din know how to use a particular software to analyze my data, esp when i've been collecting data for so long... hehh.. that's me.. too proud to ask my lab RA, but it's okie to b dumb in front of my own peers.. hehh.. :p

boo!

hehe.. din know u guys were counting. i wasnt. =P

well, geez.. am back.

hello..!

hehh.. sorry, a bit unused to this blog-space liaoz. haha. been travelling around to different bloggies. i guess u all shd know by now that i hav a few bloggies. hee. jus shifted into a new one, but that one is for e-mentoring purposes, so u guys shant be able to access it. hee.. strictly for e-mentors onli. :p bleh.

let's see. what has been happening in my life.. hmm.. sanctification week in my church was good. u guys can read bout it in my other bloggie. well, except the last day.. hmm...

oooh.. today my lab fren mentioned that we can register for our graduation gown! so soon! commencement is jus around the corner. okies, mb now i'm responding better to this fact. earlier on today, i was like, 'o darn, my hyp is nowhere near completion'. Lol. guess one starts to see things differently the longer one thinks about it, n the wisest decision to make is to see things for the better, not the worse. ;)

okies.. this blog shall observe a period of rest for 12 days. u guys will find out why pretty soon, but seriously there will be no new entry from now on until.. well, 12 days later. cheers, ppl, i'll still keep in touch with u all somehow. *smile*

finally it rains, very heavily too. it's like God releasing His Holy Spirit.. hmm.. yea, i'm still very much immersed in the church atmosphere. i want it to linger on. but i realise also one realistic thing is that after a certain high, when one feels so in touch n close to God, there's the need to maintain it. that's when discipline comes in n one needs to spend time with God daily, both in worship n prayer.. God, please, now that i've found u back, dun ever let me lose u again..

had a good fellowship time after church too. went harbourfront to mom2. hee.. then, yep yep yeps, met Lex2's brother!! woohoo.. hehehe.. nah, din get my free starbucks drink. mb next time la.. first time meeting onli, a bit 'kang-kar' (awkward) la.. Lol... but yea, both look very different.. hee..

i'm happy..! *love*

hm.. seems like i can drop a line or two before my hood gets enough UV irradiation. hee.. yesterday's G12 session was GREAT! i havnt been to kallang indoor stadium for quite a while now, n the atmosphere is so charged with excitement. that was how i felt thruout the service. what's more, yesterday i jus read from the PDL book what worship is really about (shall jot down into the other blog when time permits). so i was more focused on the Person who i was worshipping, it's never about the song u sing, which song u like, what song touches ur heart. no, it's what touches God's heart. :)

i'm blessed..! *love*

actually wanna blog first while waiting before i consume my self-cooked soup noodle. last nite i burnt my tongue a lil by eating whilst it was still too hot. hee.. learnt my lesson.. but before i could blog, i was chatting with my bro on icq. aih, regarding that wormie virus again. bro said hav to uninstall icq, then install it again wor. so ma fan. i was like... -_-

anyway, that shall not dispel my wonderful mood today. hee.. i love the lushness of greenery outside my room window. hmm.. me really love a room with a view, so when i first came to this room, i was so delighted. so happy. reminds me so much of home, well to a certain degree la..

to rate this morning's effort in studying, i'd say 8 out of 10.. but productivity rate is still less than a journal in 2 hrs, still quite a number of papers to read. wanna finish reading them all by this week, so that next week, it'll jus be going thru the slides, n asking my profs lots of qstns.. mus boost the productivity rate.. n thus the need to munch on it... food, food, here i come.. yumz...

once again, i shall blog before i sleep. hm, this is becoming more of a habit. haha. but what to do, i hav to wait for my hair to dry wat. long hair takes longer to dry. i envy those with short hair. but if i were to cut my hair short again, i'll end up looking like the photo in my matric card. so nops, i dun think i can survive another haircut so soon, esp not when i'm gonna go out n start work soon.

well, it was a jolly good n looooong run jus now. well, it wasnt the running part. heh.. more like the talking session, but it was good. been a long time since we (my jogging kakis gang) did this. what with tests, assignments, projects bombarding all of us now n then, we jus cant coincide with a suitable day to really go for a long run. but really sick of short pp. haha. so, it was a good to go all the way to west coast. i think this is the first time this semester? i think so...

today is the start of G12 conference. so over the weekend, guess i shall not be coming online. need to focus on two main things: G12 n my physio paper. hope that i will b fruitful in both of them! :D

hehh.. shall sneaked in a blog before i take my shower n sleep. piggies are meant to stink a bit anyway, n they dun seem to mind at all if they sleep in their sweat. jus thank God that this lil piggie is a lil allergic to sweat n thus cannot sleep comfortably without bathing.. Lol.. :p

i'm a fighter. was viciously attacking my project today. still got loads more to do before i can show anything, but not giving up on it. i still hav time, though it may not very much be on my side. still, there's time. there's much to do, n i'm scared i'd b taken away from my bloggie. 'NooOOoOooOooo'... i can hear my bloggie screaming oredi.. 'dun let them hav custody of me' (them-- the unknown personalities that are often spoken of, n yet not known. notice how often it comes out of people's conversation in the form of 'they say' this and 'they say' that.. beware of 'them'!)..

well, had a good coffee break session with my labmates, n a lab neighbour.. hehe.. it was unusual for us to hav breaks in between our work, but for my part, it was cos my fren's gonna stay late in lab, so i might as well cast my gel at a later hour to keep her company. plus, i was all armed with my jap book n wanted to do some exercises in the canteen when up came one labmate. he sat down n we chatted. he was waiting for 6pm to start his work. then out came the lab neighbour to join us. hehe.. n finally the trio was completed with the final addition to the gang, my other labmate - my fren who was to stay late to add drug. so the foursome had a good talk, bout future, bout career, bout boh-liao stuff that u wun know hons students are capable of talking bout. Lol.. was a good time.. :)

and it sure was good to end off today with AMi.. love it, love it, love it! hee.. some people cant understand what's so nice bout watching others sing. was it for the part where they get criticised? well, that's not it at all, not all of it anyway. there's this excitement in wanting to know who's the next AMi. well true that u can always watch the ending, like what i did last year cos i barely knew what AMi was. but that's the diff, i din know bout it much last year. now that i know, i wanna follow every single episode til the end. it's rather hard to explain, but to put it simply, it'd b like following some chinese drama series. hee.. n yeups, i'm prone to be labelled as one of those victims.. haha.. :p

oooh.. jus wanna mention sth.. was running to the tv room in blk 3 to watch, but alas, a couple got there before me. so eeks, wun like to be the light bulb though it might be fun to spoil their night. *evil grin*... but nay.. it'll b more like they spoiling my show.. :p So off i ran to the next nearest tv room, the big one next blk 4.. a lot of ppl in there, ppl i dunno.. but watching the show was all it matters. phew, managed to make it in time.. yayy.. love all the singers. they're all amazing except for a few of them, but simon was unexpectedly nice to these few not-so-good singers.. yay, he does hav a heart after all.. hehe..

opps... typed too much liaoz... time to go bathe, bathe, bathe.. then sleep, sleep, sleep... much work awaits to be done tmr... *dread*... but sleep for now is utmost impt! ;)

Lol.. jus what i need to distract me from my boring chore of studying, i guess. my comp jus got hit with a worm virus. well, it's sth new for me. i'm rather sheltered from all these virus attacks, so when one comes up, i really dun know what to do. thanks to my technical consultants *winks*..

but what's funny is before i realised my comp got a virus, i was actually about to change one of my blogs' settings, etc.. then was gonna blog sth in there.. then billa-boom.. my comp crashed. i was thinking, 'God, i'm not sposed to do that?'.. haa.. that's what u get when u try to talk to God too much. everything seems God-related, but hm, i wun b surprised if it is!..

anyway, this virus scare was much needed. in the midst of warning others that they may get the worm-infested url from me, i manage to catch up with some frens thru icq. hehe.. normally i wun icq them cos they're usu either in busy or occupied mode, or i jus hav not talked to them for too long.. it was good. okies.. i think my comp shd b worm-free now. hee.. hopefully the owner would be bact-free too. :p

me: there was a fountain, fongky, a fountain. i never knew that 2 pieces of bread could buy so much peace n happiness. well, at least, at that point of time. hm, now i know that i dun hav to finish all my bread before it expires. they will eat it for me, gladly. i wonder if they'll hav my porridge as well. *grinz*.. wish u were there. not as much fun without u..

me: but u din want her around in the first place. u made her go.

me: i did? sigh, i guess i did. today's lil note says 'happiness is to spend a quiet afternoon with close friends'. was really looking forward to seeing her. was, still am, very happy to have seen her. jus that if she was to get sick like Alex, i'll feel bad.

hehe.. a small dialogue brought to u by urs truly. :p

let me rant out a bit of my frustration here. i knew i shdnt hav gone back to lab right after lect today. was sposed to do some ecg measurement for my fren. but dang, she has to postpone it to tmr, n i had to walk into the lab to find my boss there. dang, dang, dang. n the dangest thing is that my labmate's result was starting to show sth. n he walked in right behind me. imagine me as invisible. the whole commotion was on him. dang, dang, dang. oh, heck. i dun care, i dun care, I DUN CARE... why did my cells hav to die? why is my expt like still going nowhere? dang, dang, dang... now i'm gonna heck all the way. gonna proceed with whatever i can for my expt. heck, heck, heck. Lol.. any more usage of these two words 'dang' and 'heck', n they will sound like curse words liaoz. Lol... finally i left the place. guess my boss like din notice me at all. what can i say anyway?

sigh... now, hav to start studying. yea, life would b more fun if we can learn every day, why ever the need to study?!

shall blog a bit before i go off to study. anyway, if there's anything that i learnt from that one sit-in lecture by Prof Ip, it'll be 'listen to what your body is telling you'. so yea, been resting a lot since yesterday. actually for the past week, my body has been giving me warning signs, jus not listening hard enough. hehh... :p

it is jus so amazing. i was browsing thru those new bloggies put up in the public mode for ppl to read. the number of blogs generated within the few minutes is like so FAST!.. jus amazing!

i am sick.

nay, nothing to do with the tension. hm... nay... haha.. though Jhee did come down with stress cough.. hmm.. (tension = stress??).. hmm... nay!... :p

but as a socially responsible citizen, i shall keep off from meeting as many people as possible these few days. shall limit my presence to the lab n my lects. so, u ppl shd b able to see me online more then. heh. that shd b the only compensatory action i can think of. Lol. even today i already hav broken my quarantine order to stay in my room. hee, hope my jogging kakis are strong enough to withstand whatever bug i'm down with. u can come and get an orange from me (if u dare to come near me, that is..) to boost up ur immune system, n really this is a good time too. many people are going down with sickness.

all of u take care yea. drink lotsa water, eat lotsa fresh fruits.. ;)

i'm in tension.
(haha. dun worry guys, it has nothing to do with the previous bloggies. :p)

well, i am a Christian. this, i think, is a well-known fact amongst most of my frens. but do i live like a Christian should? sin ming once told me that i had a world view of things. hm, *ponder* does that mean that i'm not godly in other words? haha. paranoid bout such statements stimes. i guess i dun exuberate much of a Christian lifestyle, beside saying grace before i consume every meal. stimes i'm even shy to show ppl that i'm saying grace so i do that under the pretext that i'm staring into my food for a while, as if deciding which sidedish shd b consumed first. so that's the thing bout me... i dun spell the word 'God' into my life.

yet, it is true that this godly lifestyle shd b natural. sth that jus comes from within u. that's what sister irene pointed out anyway. she said that if u know a person A very well, then u wld surely bring the person into topic when u meet another fren, telling the person how good person A is. that shd b the way it is with God!.. so i guess my solution now is to work on a better relationship with God. but God in my life is so compartmentalized (yea, the word that Dr Whiteman likes to use so much, going: 'Don't compartmentalize what you learn.. blablabla..' :p). heh.. if u all realise, i even hav a separate blog for my Christian life, or more like sermons from my church, which i had very much stopped blogging in. will start doing sth bout that soon...

shall end off with this nice quote i got from an evercare card:
we don't need to be perfect, we only need to grow

hehe.. freaked out liaoz. jus de-link my bloggie from my ivle. hee.. i hav kept a link there to see who would drop by my bloggie (LSM - was that how u found this webpage?).. but after blogging bout the confocal guy, well, i think it's best to keep this bloggie off from school premises, in the cyberspace realm, i mean. hehe.. would b so paiseh if any of my coursemates came n read what i typed yest! :p

finally, back in my room to blog. heee... been waiting all day to blog, right after my confocal microscopy assessment. heee... yups, gonna tell u all bout this cute guy who works there. sorry, pls bear with me.. haha.. how often do i go googoogaagaa over a guy? erm.. okie, i'd better not ask that qstn.. haha.. :p

as i was saying, there was this confocal microscopy assessment n there were butterflies in my tummy but not b'cos of the test la (trust me, confocal microscopy is FUN!).. hee, cant help grinning ear to ear after finishing my test. i took longer than i shd, but he was not that strict. no no, it's not b'cos it's me, cos others before me took longer than me.. sigh.. he's cute. haha.. hope to see him again, n mb can hav better conversation than 'is this image okie?', 'so i shd i save now?'... haha.. :p

oh oh.. n my class trip to Labrador Beach was really fun too, minus the part bout getting ur feet n shoes n socks wet. though the corals there are not very fantastic, not like those u see in pictures.. haha.. they actually look very tiny, or mb those in the pics are blown-up versions. o well, it was fun to touch n see those tiny tentacles. hehe.. n we saw a sea horse!! another group saw a pregnant male. so cool. hehehh.. n sea breeze does good to the soul n health. felt more relaxed n alert now. hmm.. love the sea... :)

Heard this song jus now, think it's pretty meaningful.

This one's for the girls - Martina McBride

This is for all you girls, about thirteen.
High School can be so rough; can be so mean.
Hold onto, onto your innocence.
Stand your ground, when everybody's givin' in.

This one's for the girls.

This is for all you girls, about twenty-five.
In little apartments just tryin' to get by.
Livin' on, on dreams and Spaghettios.
Wonderin' where your life is gonna go.

This one's for the girls,
Who've ever had a broken heart;
Who've wished upon a shootin' star:
You're beautiful the way you are.
This one's for the girls,
Who love without holdin' back;
Who dream with everything they have.
All around the world,
This one's for the girls.
(This one's for all the girls.)

This is for all you girls, about forty-two.
Tossin' pennies into the fountain of youth.
Every laugh, laugh line on your face,
Made you who you are today.

will i ever end up like the girl at 25? or live til 42 laughing along with life? sigh.. will i?

today's lil note says: Those who can stay alone can see the broad sky. which reminds me that i hav not looked into the beautiful blue morning sky for quite a while. n letting the light into my room at this hour of the day is simply... heart warming! ;)

good to know that even when i'm alone, i'm not really alone. the whole wide world is out there to greet me, so good morning, beautiful blue sky! :D

i'm blog dead. Lol. was wondering whether i shd blog down the happenings of the past few missing days, esp my thots. well, there are a lot of them. stimes i wish that my brain is somehow connected to this blogpage, then it will generate my thots into words right away, save my typing anyway, n also sure save a lot of digging up what i wanted to say bout my day when i blog in.

well, sure been a tiring week. think i may jus start falling sick if i dun take care of myself well enough. been feeling a lil heaty. too much coffee? heh. that's why i'm drinking bittergourd tea now to remove the heat, n hopefully keep me awake. hehh.. yesterday's aloe vera drink shd help too. hee, thanks dear. *winks*

so i might as well start off with yesterday. was sposed to spend the nite at my fren's lab, but that din work out cos her prof might come back in the middle of the night (goodness knows for what!), so i din wanna get her into trouble. n yea, shd listen to what my mind n body was telling me. i was feeling tired n thot that i could concuss anytime soon. so i headed back to pgp with my mind set on sleeping straight after i get to my room. but i only managed to sleep after: getting notes from my fren in pgp, going back to my lab again (walked all the way there, din wanna wait for the bus so that i will b in time to catch one bus back later) cos i told my labmate that i'd b staying overnite in school n suddenly he called to tell me that he forgot to add enough drug into his expt. so it was crucial that i helped him add. only thing he din know was that i wasnt around in school anymore. o well, since pgp is still on school campus anyway.... so by the time i got back, i needed to get a shower before i can pop off to sleep, n since i was taking a shower, i might as well do my long-forgotten laundry (trust me, it had been lying there for more than a week!). anyway, managed to sleep finally at around 1040pm. sigh....

well, as for Tues nite, i KO right after i come back from lab. hehh.. 11pm may b a little too early to sleep then. but i guess the fright that i might hav to do my presentation that day really wore me down. heh. but the lil note in my calendar is very encouraging, for it says: 'when you are afraid, you need a helping hand'. i'm sure glad that i got my share of helping handsss from frens around me. heh. not really like me to panic so much for a ppt, but guess i was rather worried bout the lack of preparation. anyway, i did my ppt on Wed, n it sux big time. hahaa.. i was still very much the bag of nerves (hm, i wonder where i heard this expression from..) that i was on Tues. so went thru the slides so fast that i ended, i think, the earliest compared to others. thank God, the lecturers were very nice. one of them said good job, etc. encouraging.

oh, i went for a jog on wed nite. din ask anyone cos i figure out that at this time of the semester, ppl are usu busy. n my usual jogging kakis had morning lects on Thurs (which i found out later that it's webcast n sOme peOple can jus skip it n watch it online later.. haa... :p). attempted the A2 route n failed miserably. *laugh* stopped 3 times. but i felt that every time i stopped, walked, then later continued on jogging, i became stronger than the time before i stopped. it took a lot of determination n will power to go on running. i was flat out by the end of the day. perhaps that would explain why i couldnt sleep well that nite. body was aching, n my mind was tortured with an increased level of activity.

okies, shall spare u all n not type anymore. will blog in bout my confocal microscopy assessment later. heee... :p