have i told you all what a good brother i have?

hee.. now i dun hav to feel so guilty blogging this down, cos this entry shall b dedicated to my dear brother, Alex!! he has in a tactful way allow me to use his laptop overnight, without me feeling so guilty bout it.. hehe.. now i can watch AMi on his comp without going to TV room.. yayyy... :D

if he had been a girl, i'll give my usual *muaks*.. but cos guy ma, so erm.. shall refrain from that.. haha.. but i'm really grateful!! yea yea yea.. shd show my gratefulness by working hard at my thesis yups.. hehe.. okies, that's jus what i'm gonna do!.. but 1st, a picture of this handsome brother of mine.. hehe.. introducing mr Alex -->

[action taken: picture removed.]
(okie, ppl complain that they cant see the pic. well, jus too bad then.. hehehhh.. :P)

heh hehh.. n u thot u'd b able to see his face right? of cos i wun show his face laa... copyrighted ma.. hehehe.. like some chow yun fatt picture hor.. can see back (or head in this case), but cannot see face.. hehehe.. me need to ask permission before putting his picture here ma.. so for now, this shall suffice.. yes, this is the person i'm really grateful to now.. hehe.. not jus once, but he lent me his laptop twice liaoz!! :D thankee yee, brethren!

i promise myself this will b a short one.. feeling guilty using Lex2's laptop to come here n blog.. but currently my brain juice is so dry, sien of doing my thesis, no motivation there.. n studying.. well, i keep thinking of my thesis.. haiz.. this is a vicious cycle.. :(

anyway, jus to announce to u guys that i'm still alive, though living with a dead comp.. hope its ressurection day will come tis Fri when Dr Yi Ko comes n help me see what he can still make out of it. and i bought myself a small notebook over the weekend, all too timely too. that shall b my temporary blog arena.. hehehe.. ;)

independence day 28th April 2004, 12 noon.. mus keep that in mind n already activities are piling up... hehee.. shall b happily busy after that.. :D

yesh.. i shall boast of another night conquered.. hehehe.. well, it's good here, at my bro's place. usu i come here jus to relax. i guess it's this relaxed atmosphere that i need. now armed with my eld bro's laptop for the nite, n my 2nd bro's entire beachboys songs on the cd which he burnt esp for me!! (currently i'm jus crazy bout the beachboys. hahaha..).. *muaks* thanks brothers!! hehehe.. yeps.. this is the way i think i can piece my thesis together. hmm.. i like it here. hopefully i can bring bits of this atmosphere back to my roomie for next week. ;)

jus had frozen papaya with chocolate syrup.. not jus any syrup, but hersley's choc syrup!! yumz.. hehe.. i know, i know, what they (yes, the mysterious 'they') say bout not trying out weird food combi jus before ur exam. but well, i bought the papaya some time ago, had it cut on Tues, or was it Mon? anyway, the point is that it had been in the freezer for a while, n i hate to waste food or allow it to spoil.. yea, i'd rather spoil my stomach.. hehh.. anyway, still feeling fine now.. hehe.. :p

well, a few more hours to my first exam paper for this sem. actualli not my 1st paper cos during the sem i did take one paper liaoz. hehh.. last nite i was feeling like not sleeping but i know what effect that will hav on me, so i forced myself to sleep at least 6 hours.. got up energized n managed to look at my lecture notes without freaking out (eeks, why so many foreign points wan?!!! nvm nvm.. calm down, it's open book, it's open book.. and u hav 2 hours to do 2 qstns.. no way u can flop, right?... right?!!... yes, right... hehh...)..

okies.. short break over.. back to cosolidating those ..eeks.. foreign points.. :S

oh, let me cry.. let me jus die ba.. no AMi for me tonite.. my new temp harddisk doesnt hav any driver for my sound card so it's really a torture not having any sound n jus seeing the ppl singing on ch5... *wail*... tmr got exam paper some more.. how to study with all this frustration in life?!!!... grrr...

o well.. my fren commented yest that all these are actually luxuries in life that we enjoy, that we dun need. luxuries that hav been made into needs. haiz. come think of it, her saying has some weight. many years ago cars or any form of transport was not seen as a need, but today, u jus cant go anywhere without the transport system. well, of cos u can.. then again, who would?... haiz...

wait, i'm not thru' whining bout my missed AMi... WHINE!!!... :(

and yea.. it's really hot these days.. sweltering hot. went hiding in medic lib today. some cool comfort. even the temp in there are not as freezing cold as last time.. brr.. what's happening to the world these days? a rise in the temp is bad for coral reef. can cause bleaching, n if prolonged, it can kill the corals.. bad, bad, baddd.. haha.. yea.. preparing for tmr's open book exam. jus thank God that it's an open book exam. i dun understand why lately, this sem esp, i'm getting all the panic attacks. my last sem, last series of exam papers to take.. n then all the insecurity that i feel.. sigh.. getting a little unnerved now... okie, time for my shower, some cooling comfort i hope... no AMi... *cry*

dang.. comp realli crashed last nite. the trojan or wadever wormie was jus too powderful.. dang the wormies! they want war? fine, war it is then.. onli that i hav oredi lost the battle.. haha.. now using my dear brother Alex's laptop.. hehe.. while he's away for his morning exam paper, here i am blogging.. okie okie.. shall not blog too much.. need to get down to serious work today. gonna study for my open book exam tis Friday.. but open book ma, so seemingly not so threatening.. well, that is cos i havnt realli looked at the past yr exam papers yet.. jus looked at the onli one that i managed to print out last nite.. seems quite tough.. *gulp*.. o well.. anyhow oso hav to sit for it wan ma.. :p

hmm.. will b getting a foreign harddisk from my bro tis evening.. ew.. foreign, alien.. o well.. need to get used to it.. mb i can store more trash.. hehe.. btw, warning to those with poor anti-virus software.. stay away from xanga website (hee, no offense lil brother).. cos me seems to b getting all the virus from there, or i can confirm thus far that i get funny pop-ups n home page settings installed into my internet explorer. n trust me, i surf no porn websites, k! God forbids! well, i guess my compie realli has a very low immune system, that's why more prone to all these viral attacks ba.. sighz.. get well soon, my poor lil compie.. i miss u lots!.. :S

*ahhhh*.. cant take it no more... :S

but i guess in times like these, God always blesses me with little happenings in my life. hm, like a short chat with a good chum in the morn n an sms from her subsequently.. that's gotta make my morning bright n cheery.. then followed by a looong chat with a fren over icq.. i think he's sian bout studying oso.. well, he'll be having all his papers in one go, from thurs til sat.. at least then he'll hav his celebration by the end of tis week! but for me, it wld b the mere beginning!.. *dread*.. then me got a study date with a fren for my open book exam.. that has got to help get me studying rather than bumming ard trying to get my thesis done (which currently is still at a very shabby n pathetic state).. n my darling godsis called too.. yayy.. all the little angels that God sends to me..

oh oh.. it's brother Seanie's bday today too.. happy birthday lil brother!!! :D
hehe.. i bold it up so that everyone will take note.. ;)

then there's family. my sis sms-ed me. yea.. good to hear from her. then my 2nd bro jus told me that my mom's registered letter has finally arrived.. phew.. thot it was lost in the mail or sth.. hee.. the letter carries a precious cargo.. hehh.. shant tell u all.. :p

o well.. God has His ways of controlling me too.. think i watched too much naruto liaoz.. my window media player is not working.. my comp got infected with many wormies.. mostly trojans.. sigh.. sick comp, sick owner.. Lol.. so slow now.. n poor comp, needs to see the doctor ever so often.. but more or less on the recovery stage.. :)

okie, i guess i really need to count my blessings.. now i feel better oredi.. hee.. God bless each n every one of u for ur exams tis week.. :)

i die die mus oso blog tonite.. hahaha.. fingers itching to blog.. brain bursting with activities.. even though i told myself that i need to restore my usual sleeping hours, cant afford to be a nite person no more.. not much of one anyway, considering that i dose off or KO very often if i force myself to stay up late.. n tis morn, i was bed-ridden. was jus so tired to get out of bed. yeps, losing that steam to go on.. but go on i mus.. n yeaa... today i really concluded my labwork. once n for all, i washed my hands off my stuff. hehh.. transferred my cells under the care of the master student, cleared my reagents... gone, gone, gone, all gone.. nyenyenyehh..

well, i manage to catch the Passion for the second time, with my bro n his gf. shall blog about it in my other blog (chk it out under my fave link 'a part of my world'). going out was good. yea, i do believe that we humans need to go out once in a while.. hehehhh.. i'd really love an Iora's striped blouse.. it looks really nice, n i tried on their skirts before. looks good too.. hee.. n ooh, saw that this high tea item at crepes n cream going for $5.50 with cake n coffee.. what a good deal!.. sigh, the not-so-good-side bout window shopping is that u see what u want, but u jus cant buy or get. no money no talk. :p

and these days, i've been contemplating bout getting a bf. hahaha.. *blush*.. yeaa.. what's wrong with that? ur reply might b: 'well, nothing wrong at all, jus that do u hav to say it out loud in ur blog? who are u trying to tell?!!'... erm.. hehe.. i'm trying to tell ALL of u... hahaa.. attention to all ye available bachelors.. ahem.. okies, enough of that.. what i mean to tell u guys n gals is that i've been quite in the pits lately. who wldnt be? exams being ard the corner.. okies, those ppl with onli one paper to take, u guys are not allowed to say anything bout tis.. :P bleh.. back to what i was saying, so, it got me thinking that having a bf might not b that bad after all. i'll hav someone i can whine to.. haha.. oh, i know i always have Someone to whine to, but it's jus not the same.. i guess He knew, n that was why He created Eve for Adam.. hehee..

anyway, i was jus thinking. no harm done in thinking onli, right?.. but i guess i still prefer the kind of freedom i hav now. kinda enjoy it. the freedom to hang out with lots of frens.. to spend time getting to know people.. it's really interesting too.. well, i guess i still cant get myself down to committing myself to one person as yet. nops.. that din happen to my 1st relationship, n that was partly why it flopped. so i guess i wun be ready for another relationship as yet. :)

yesh.. conquered another night at my lab. hehh.. actualli it wasnt necessary to stay back, but i wanted to get my work done asap. n oso if i ever get back into my room, i'd jus sleep n sleep.. or b in the sleepy non-working mode.. so needed me lab to do my data stuff too.. heee...

now waiting for my MacD's bfast with sister Jenny. hee.. it's her bday today.. hehehe.. n i'm making the most out of it by having macD's bfast with her. i hope they still serve that new bfast bagel item... hmm... yea.. with lil piggie, it's all about food.. *chuckles*..

ooo.. i went out with my fren from Brunei yest.. yeps, another day out for me.. nyanyanya.. i gotta hav it lar.. i think i will die if i jus continue on working straight non-stop.. gimme a break.. i need to have life, n have it to the full!... hehehe.. anyway, my fren bought this Sun Yanzi The Moment CD for onli $9 n i swear it almost near original.. it might jus as well b original.. but going for $9.. wow... and i fell in love with this other song of hers called 'tian hei hei'.. hmm... dreamy.. i want the CD!!! hehee.. shall get it when i get my first pay.. hahaa...

finally got to watch passion yest.. sizzling hot-news item passion.. yea, that show about Jesus Christ, the show that everyone has been talking about, it being the controversial movie of the year, perhaps of the decade, or century even.. so hyped up... but when i went to see the show.. o well... someone said i shd bring tissue paper.. well, i did tear a bit in the show, but i wun say i cried buckets.

i was more intrigued by the language. n a few scenes that i couldnt recall reading from the Bible. yar.. perhaps i was comparing most of the time, trying to make heads n tails of what they were doing. i do like the flashbacks though. the time when Jesus was with His momie, that was like seeing Jesus as human, as u and me, as someone else's son. Jesus has all the while been God's Son to me, God in nature, Jesus = God. this show makes me see Jesus in the flesh, how He is just like u and me..

n the way they tortured him.. well, that was jus plain gross. sadists! absolute mean n lowly people. how could they even hav it in their hearts to do such mean things to another fellow human? no matter how much a person has inflicted hurt on another, he doesnt deserve to be punished or tortured to that degree. my fists jus clenched at every single blow. the nails that went into the hands.. feet was worse.. i could feel the bones breaking at every single blow... O God... why? why were those people so mean??

okies, shall not say more about the show. go watch it for urself. i sure dun regret watching it, esp not when i watched it with a coupla good frens. though i cant agree more with vvayz that this show could be better watched alone. mb then i wun b so conscious.. mb then i would indeed hav wailed n cried buckets.. but i guess, if that was the case, yea, i would rather watch with frens. let me do the crying when i'm alone with Him, not in some cinema with many unknown faces, no.. this is not a show staged for others to see, but one between me n Him..

as an ending note about the show. i really thank God for Mel Gibson for making this show, n putting in as much Bible perspective as possible. Now, millions in the world would have seen Jesus, and carry with them back a mental picture of what He has done on the cross.. all His suffering.. yea, can we ever outbeat Him in all that He has suffered willingly for us?..

yest was a good day. :D

morning was rather crappy. expt flopped big time. wasted my effort in going so early to prepare. felt ever so wasted, n hated what i'm doing in my lab ever so much. hate the term known as 'optimisation'... hate it, hate it, loathe it.. haha.. actually now, i think i lost the effect of capitalising the phrase 'loathe it'. i had in mind to really put it in caps to accentuate the extent of my frustration that morn.. but....

thank God for the special kind of ship that He has given me. yeps, thank God for friendship. spent the rest of that day with friends.. am thankful for their presence in my life. hehh.. n i really need everyone of u. *MUAKS*

met up with an old brunei fren in the evening. went to this nice vegetarian restaurant with her in bugis. her treat!! *face brightened up* cos she's working ma, so can treat me lor.. Lol.. but then me treated her to a movie. wanted to watch the passion of Christ but ended up watching twisted cos we din know that the passion would b screened in hebrew. i mean, it would b cool to actually b able to hear hebrew being spoken out.. but my fren wasnt too keen on it, esp not in reading english subtitle throughout the show. hopefully they hav an english version one being screen somewhere, so that we still could go n catch it some other day (before friday.. eeks, cant believe she's flying back home so soon!!)..

well, a day which started out bad in the lab, ended up blessed in the lab.. hehehe.. me took 198 back from holland v after sending my fren home, n guess where the nearest spot the bus can dropped me... yups, at the bus stop next to the SRC track. so sigh, since so near to science, then i popped by my lab to do some expt that i was sposed to do tis morn so i dun hav to go lab so early in the morn. hehehe.. called up another fren then she came by my lab so that i could help her out with her dilution calculations.. went @_@.. thank God that my maths can still b used. Lol.. had a very early bfast (my fave durian mt fuji!!) at NUH... sigh.. KO like a log at 430am..

yea... yest was a good day. had the most fun so far in the past few weeks! :D

yesterday, i was eating for eating's sake...
today i was eating for hunger's sake...
i think i reached a satiety state...
that i jus dun feel like bingeing anymore...

oh, today was half a bowl too much of tau suan... craving for all sweet stuff is gone liaoz.. feel like puking even when my RA (Tini is back!!!) offered me a pinch of her kitkat... :S