Disclaimer: Please read the following with a pinch (or a bowl, if needed) of salt.

I cannot or rather I shall not be transparent. It may be hard for you to understand, why it is so difficult for me. Perhaps it seems so unnatural to me, so very vulnerable to allow you to see through me. What else then would be left on me, what else would there be left for you to see? Maybe my greatest struggle is in losing you. That when you finally see and understand my very being, you will leave me, never to cast another look at me again. I don't want to lose you. Yet the irony is that by putting this self on, in the end I lose not only you, but also myself.